Tuesday’s Troubles

by Mike Meyer

Perhaps we can prorogue the Trump catastrophe? If we could request the Black Rod to appear at the White House and request Trump’s presence in the Lord’s chamber so he could be informed to go home for four or five months, wouldn’t that be a blessing?

Oh well, it was an idea. I do think we probably now have two or three bands named Black Rod ready to book gigs. I won’t even mention what might be happening in the porno industry. Since the Black Rod is a role and was neither black nor a rod there is a ot of opportunity that will, nevertheless, be slightly confusing to the audience.

This is all so bizarre as to be almost incomprehensible. The best the US can come up with, having worn out sharpiegate before heads rolled, is John Bolton’s head rolling. Naturally his head insisted that it hadn’t rolled but had removed itself for personal reasons. In fact it may still be rolling around in the West Wing somewhere but let’s hope not.

Having had to watch the endless effort to foment ware and disasters by John Bolton for much of my life I would be very happy if his body would take his head and put it somewhere never to be seen again.

In an even weirder line, the whole concept of the war mongering and islamophobic John Bolton together with Donald ‘the Dunce’ Trump was a match made in hell. It certainly adds to the bizarreness now as every moderately rational person on the planet is happy that Trump fired Bolton. Trump and Bolton. Does that mean that two negatives make a positive?

It is very clear that Trump is unable to do anything positive except by accident. I’m still very uneasy by allowing the word ‘positive’ to appear in the same sentence with the word ‘Trump’. That just seems unnatural.

Since the rumors are that Bolton ended up being visited by the Black Rod over Trump’s cancelation of the Afghanistan peace meeting we really should factor that into the multiple negatives producing a positive equation. Unfortunately that is so strange it is not clear why any of this happened other than Trump’s worsening confusion.

Since the whole thing was announced as a done deal a week or so ago, that always indicates the details were not settled but were at least in vicinity of a settlement, its hard ot see what was to have happened. Other than trying to grab some credit which he would have claimed anyway, there was no reason for the Trump to stumble in to mess everything up.

I’ve noticed that no one seems to be willing to try to justify this except the most abject and shitcovered among the Trump sycophonts, Pompeo et al, as it is not clear what anyone’s position was or is on the what was or wasn’t happening. The best analogy I can see is a cow (Trump is not a bull except in his imagination) got in the china shop, knocked stuff over and shit on the floor while everyone had to wait for the cow to be herded back out.

The cow will be distracted mooing about Bolton now so work can begin again on Afghanistan. No harm done. Even our enemies seem to understand that you can’t do anything about an insane person causing trouble except wait for them to be taken away. It’s a force of nature and not worth talking about.

Somehow I’m both comforted and not comforted by that realization. The only good thing is that Trump is becoming less and less relevant in what is actually happening. Bolton may not agree but that’s ok.

Meanwhile Kim Jong Un is shooting off rockets again but the Donald insists he doesn’t mean it. It seems no one else is paying attention and that is a bit worrying. The Donald’s close friends all share the need to be the center of all attention. If not then they tend to get demanding and have to think up things to upset people. That is not good.

Even Abe is distracted by reshuffling his cabinet in an ongoing snit with South Korea. Abe is removing people too close to South Korea but how North Korea fits into that needs to be determined. It could be that everyone is trying to play the old Nixon ‘crazy man’ strategy but that one has been ruined, also, by Trump. It’s hard to play the crazy man when you have an actual crazy man scaring the shit out of everyone on things that make no sense. You need to make a little sense in order to be truly threatening.

A certain look to the eyes and tendency to suggest things without saying them works but wild threats, bombast, and bullshit is just boring uncle stuff. That is not a threat but just a pain in the Thanksgiving ass.

Of course Trump blocked the refugees from the Bahamas from coming to the US for food. Of course he did because they are all the wrong color, except for the ones with the right combination of green and white. This is so completely not funny that it is completely not funny. It is an endless loop of not funny. That loop needs to end.

I think Trump should be sent to the Bahamas with five rolls of paper towels and left to fend for himself for a week. He could try to trade paper towels for food. It would be a lesson.