This is an excellent presentation of Aristotelian virtue as habit. I’ve been stumped by the reality of self quarantine as an insurmountable problem for post paradigmatic change civilizations. That directly relates to everything you describe. A subset of people tend to cluster with their perceived or inherited tribal group. Hate and exclusion are the inevitable results. Some of them are that way by accident and where they were born or have always lived but others can’t be any other way.
Doing that defines the group that is rebelling against the egalitarian rules and individual rights of the liberal social order. Within those groups there is little experience of diversity and respect as you perfectly describe. I grew up in the same type of midwestern environment. My suburban high school in Indianapolis had zero students of color out of 1,500 even with a large black population in the city. Until 1965 no one questioned that. At least no one that I knew about.
I knew people in our community who made the effort to meet and know other people. My father was one of those. My mother would not allow my father’s black farmer friends in the house.
But you cannot expect much to change for people who live in homogenous and self restricted communities whatever they may say that they believe.
This is the reason I keep ending in a vision of fully diverse metropolitan regions needing to support self quarantined segments of the population in surrounding isolation communities. They need to be able to govern their own communities but they are, predominantly, unable to govern anyone else. But that leads to tiered citizenship.
But we are, not what we profess, but what we do everyday.